Whose Dreams?

According to a new study led by Eddie Brummelman of Utrecht University in the Netherlands, some parents want their children to "redeem their broken dreams".
Researchers found that the more a parent saw their child as a part of themselves, the more likely they are to want their child to succeed in achieving their own failed dreams.

"Some parents see their children as extensions of themselves rather than separate people with their own hopes and dreams", says Professor Brad Bushman, co-author of the study.

This is nothing new, we have always known how some parents can transfer their own dreams unto their children. Yet, whilst we have had the theories, this is the first time it has been experimentally tested. [ For those interested the study can be read on PLOS ONE ]

However, this study itself is not what I am aiming at in this post.

After reading the study I began to wonder, how many people might in fact be living their parents dreams, without realising they are doing so?
How many of us truly chose the career path we are on, or the college degree we are aiming at?
Could the idea of it perhaps, have been seeded in childhood by a parent or caregiver, and at some point we have accepted it as ours?

hope said:

After reading the study I began to wonder, how many people might in fact be living their parents dreams, without realising they are doing so?
How many of us truly chose the career path we are on, or the college degree we are aiming at?
Could the idea of it perhaps, have been seeded in childhood by a parent or caregiver, and at some point we have accepted it as ours?

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Interesting subject. I think we will get to nurture/nature conundrum on this one too. How much weight has parents pressure and how much genetic predisposition towards choosing parents occupation is involved? if there is a study in this direction it would have to be done on adopted kids to eliminate as much genetic factor as possible, then comparing it to statistic of same blood families. Although adopted kids can have similar predispositions as their caregivers by chance. Comparing adopted children choices to their biological parents would be interesting too.

If father is an officer in army and kid becomes fireman, does this mean that pressure worked partially?

LeBrok said:

How much weight has parents pressure and how much genetic predisposition towards choosing parents occupation is involved?

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Ah, now that`s a good point LeBrok.

I still believe both nature and nurture play a role in a persons development. As, no doubt I probably said before [ and sorry to be repetitive] I feel a person inherits a map for development, nature. But I think the environment can make an impact on how the directions are expressed.
Now whilst I feel there may be a case for some people making certain career choices via parental input [and of course this is not applicable to all] it of course, can`t be ruled out that they may have chosen that career anyway ,I agree.

LeBrok said:

if there is a study in this direction it would have to be done on adopted kids to eliminate as much genetic factor as possible

LeBrok said:

That would be a good approach. I don`t think it will ever happen though...pity.

LeBrok said:

If father is an officer in army and kid becomes fireman, does this mean that pressure worked partially?

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Well, I suppose it could depend on how the father was perceived..eg. was he seen as a good father, did the mother speak in a positive way regarding his work? Was his job or position endorsed as important or helpful to his community? If seen in this light, if the semantics surrounding the fathers work were positive then perhaps that would subconsciously effect the childs career choice and he might follow in same or at least a similar pattern. When you consider it, the army officer and the fireman both work to serve the greater community.

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