Do Looks Really Matter?

Do looks really matter?

  • Yes

    Votes: 35 38.9%
  • No

    Votes: 10 11.1%
  • Sometimes, Initially, Partially...

    Votes: 45 50.0%

  • Total voters
    90
How about how important is your own look to you ?
Isn't this a reflection of how important, other people looks, are to you ?

Possibly if someone spend hours in front of the mirror before going out, for this person it is more important how other people look, than someone that doesn't check his/her self out in the mirror before going out.

Does it make sense ?
 
Rich303 said:
I still prefer 'nice' people - I don't care if being nice sucks.
Nice as in kind, considerate, reliable - what's wrong with that?
I'm not sure I'd want a girl who is attracted to nasty men, anyway.
They're just setting themselves up for years of misery and bitterness later on.
Peace!

Beeing egoistic and selfconfident will get you much further than beeing nice and selfconfident ,thats just the sad truth.
 
moffeltoff said:
Beeing egoistic and selfconfident will get you much further than beeing nice and selfconfident ,thats just the sad truth.

It depends what you want out of life Moff.

but I understand what you mean - that you need to be tough to get to the top(e.g in a job), that's a fair enough opinion.
 
scieck said:
How about how important is your own look to you ?
Isn't this a reflection of how important, other people looks, are to you ?
Possibly if someone spend hours in front of the mirror before going out, for this person it is more important how other people look, than someone that doesn't check his/her self out in the mirror before going out.
Does it make sense ?
I agree, I spend loads of money on: makeup, clothes, accessories etc...and I spend much time in front of the mirror every morning, and and also during the day.
Looks are important to me, and that is also the reason I spend much money on hairdressers, facials a few times a year, manicure, working out at the gym etc....
The looks on a person is first impression for me....:blush:
 
Are looks important to me? Thanks to the internet, looks have started to matter less and less to me. I judge people based on their morals and their education. I'd say that looks matter to everyone, at first. There are certain occasions, though, when we go beyond the looks, and find something truly beautiful. By that time, looks don't really matter that much.

Do I care how I look? Not really... unless its a costume for some sort of theatrical production...or if its a costume to scare little kids on Halloween.:wave:

I wear no makeup (unless I want to use it for costumes). For clothing, I prefer to wear whatever feels nicest. I'll pick up some clothes based on what they look like, but that's only for formal occasions or if they'll serve some other (preferably humorous) purpose. I was blessed with perfect teeth that have withstood abuse that would make some people cringe. :cool:
 
I would also like to add on to my earlier posts. Attraction is something that happens virtually on its own... without any conscious decision at all.

It has been studied that 95% of our decisions are made by our unconscious minds. The other 5% is made by pre-determined thoughts.
 
Kinsao said:
IMO, most people don't look 'terrible' really... unless they don't wash themself or brush their hair at all, or something :sick: I don't really think of people as 'ugly'... just that some people stand out as good-looking from the rest (majority) as 'ordinary'.
I would agree with that. I find very good looking people unattractive. There aren't many people I would call ugly. The vast majority of people lie somewhere in between - they are attractive in their own way.
lastmagi said:
I'm attracted to personality. For me, that's what defines how attractive people are. I know I've fallen for a lot of gals who at first glance didn't look at all pretty, but after I'd gotten to know them, they seem to get prettier.
That's true for me too. You don't have to talk to someone for very long to see beyond their looks and find their personality attractive. When I first met Simon I thought he looked like a geek, but it took just long enough for him to pay for a bottle of milk for me to see what is attractive about him.
Rich303 said:
I think there is some truth to the saying ''Treat them mean, keep them keen''.
when it comes to getting the ladies...So, I will keep being 'nice', but maybe I need to re-evaluate my approach to the fairer sex.
I don't think you would be very happy with someone who didn't appreciate your nice personality! I don't know anyone who likes being treated mean - I just think some people don't know any different, and their lack of experience with nice people stops them from finding such a person attractive. But in reality, everyone would be happier with someone nice. Some people don't want to be happy though.
moffeltoff said:
Beeing egoistic and selfconfident will get you much further than beeing nice and selfconfident ,thats just the sad truth.
As Rich says, further towards what? Anything that requires me to be something I'm not isn't worth the pursuit.
Mitsuo Oda said:
I would also like to add on to my earlier posts. Attraction is something that happens virtually on its own... without any conscious decision at all.
It has been studied that 95% of our decisions are made by our unconscious minds. The other 5% is made by pre-determined thoughts.
I think that's true. Sight isn't the only sense - we process all kinds of information about a person when we first meet them, and who knows what affect it has on us subconsciously?
 
Well, I like to think I'm a nice guy. I'm just ugly as sin!

:D
 
Hum...personnally I'm not the ordinary "look is everything" guy but I do believe that look plays an important part during the 1st contact.
As for this unconsciousness thing well...that might explain why I rarely feel at ease with girls I could potentially date and end up acting like a total stranger :p
 
:blush: For example for me the big role the naked figure of the girl and expression of her face , than, how she is dressed (but in clothes I feel style strongly...)...:blush:
Least it is interesting me to communicate with the girl "intellectually" - it is very"strain"...:p
It is better to drink good wine and to look, how the naked girl in twilight dances...
In a life and so is a lot of problems...:wave:
 
Tsuyoiko said:
As Rich says, further towards what? Anything that requires me to be something I'm not isn't worth the pursuit.

Well you can be yourself even if you are a selfish ******* even a nice guy can easily become one without not beeing himself its all a question of adapting.
 
Of course looks matter, they aren't everything--and when you're in a relationship they can eventually come to mean almost nothing--but they do matter.

I get sick of all these people saying "looks don't matter, it's just a media lie" and then citing as an example a relationship they had with someone who was "only average"--can you honestly tell me it would have been the same if they were fargin repulsive instead of average?

Of course not. Looks aren't everything, so a person with a deficiency in the physical department can make it up with charm and personality, and likewise a smoking body isn't enough if you've got the personality of a blow-up doll--but all these things matter.

...unless you're blind or something. XD

Physical attractiveness isn't just media hype--it's instinctual, an inborn process of selecting a suitible mate for procreation. Granted, alot of what is considered "beautiful" is manufactured these days, so by the time you're an adult you're veiws on physical attractiveness can be significantly altered by social conditioning--but even if none of that was there we would still have an instinctive sense of what was and was not attractive.

Even in long term relationships where beauty has ceased to matter, how the person looks is still important. If you're wife or husband of 30 years came home one day and looked like someone completely different--not more or less atractive, just like a different person--can you honestly say it wouldn't make a difference?

Of course it would, we come to recognize the person we love visually--however they look becomes "beautiful" to us over time, but if they suddenly looked like someone else it would be hard to ignore your senses telling you that it wasn't them.

The idea that "looks don't matter" is every bit as much propaganda as the idea that looks do matter--the propganda just comes from different camps.

Ultimately it's the complete package that makes--or breaks--the deal, not any one feature.
 
Do looks really matter?

good question.look DO NOT matter in the sense that if you fall in love with someone you're only going to have eyes for them anyway.looks DO matter in the sense that when you fall in love and you only have eyes for them that you realize they're total eye candy! :p you have to realize, you might be a perfectionist..there is someone out there for everyone as everyone in the world has different tastes..someone might have a thing for tattoos, or scars, another for smooth perfect skin..someone else might go for short guys, another for super-tall. you're unique-and that's why someone will fall for you. all YOU have to do is enjoy it.

however, the key point here that i'm sensing is that you're not loving yourself-if you think you're slightly overweight-and this is one of the things you mention bout your whole self in two lines, then i'm guessing that youre probably weighing yourself down with guilt and negativitiy as well. could that be stopping you from going out and living a better life? if so, just see if you can lose that bit of weight you think makes you look bad..you will feel so much better-emotionally, and physically.
 
I had a conversation with my South Korean girlfriend once about this topic.

She often mentions that the clothes here are so plain, too mature looking, and that there are so few clothes for young people.

Then she made a comment about my clothes, which are often grey or black and very simple. Nevertheless there are still so many guys going after me.

I laughed and told her that in western countries people don't go into that much effort to dress up unlike in South Korea or Japan. She told me that if I were to go to Korea for vacation I would discover that people would make lots of effort to dress up very beautifully over there! Mum later told me that in all of the East Asian countries girls need to dress up very well to attract guys!

I continued to express my point of view and told her that, if all that people cared about were fancy clothes then the young people here wouldn't go on dates and have relationships.

I think she watches too much television, television isn’t real!

I believe Physical attraction is more about the person rather than her clothes. After all in the end the guy just wants to see you naked. Some like boobs, thigh, butt or even feet!

They don't care about clothes, it is mostly the girls who do, or she has this impression because of the fashion magazines she has been reading!

Yes compare to Japan or Korea it is true people here wear much simpler clothes. However, seriously compare to Perth or other cities in Australia I had always thought that the clothes here were of wide selections.

This is not the case anymore because of what people who come from metropolis cities have been telling me.

So I guess looks matter but they are only one part of the picture!
 
Looks always mater, to some extent.
 
Yes, indeed they do says scientific research. I would link you to sciencedaily if i could. There was one article that suggested teachers favored the better looking children. There was some other stuff on there too that was pretty damning
 
I also think that people may respond differently based on how much initial impressions count with them. See, I am not a believer in the idea that the first impression counts for much. So basically i wouldnt be suprised if people who were unaware of the research and who felt as I do, would answer in the "partially" catagory
 
I had a conversation with my South Korean girlfriend once about this topic.

She often mentions that the clothes here are so plain, too mature looking, and that there are so few clothes for young people.

Then she made a comment about my clothes, which are often grey or black and very simple. Nevertheless there are still so many guys going after me.

I laughed and told her that in western countries people don't go into that much effort to dress up unlike in South Korea or Japan. She told me that if I were to go to Korea for vacation I would discover that people would make lots of effort to dress up very beautifully over there! Mum later told me that in all of the East Asian countries girls need to dress up very well to attract guys!

I continued to express my point of view and told her that, if all that people cared about were fancy clothes then the young people here wouldn't go on dates and have relationships.

I think she watches too much television, television isn’t real!

I believe Physical attraction is more about the person rather than her clothes. After all in the end the guy just wants to see you naked. Some like boobs, thigh, butt or even feet!

They don't care about clothes, it is mostly the girls who do, or she has this impression because of the fashion magazines she has been reading!

Yes compare to Japan or Korea it is true people here wear much simpler clothes. However, seriously compare to Perth or other cities in Australia I had always thought that the clothes here were of wide selections.

This is not the case anymore because of what people who come from metropolis cities have been telling me.

So I guess looks matter but they are only one part of the picture!

I like your response there lady. You definately understand the male perspective. I would say though that women focus too much on clothing instead of things like good skin and hair. The face is something that I pay alot of attention to, so perhaps thats why these things are a big deal to me. Good face+thin body (here in america, alot of women are HUGE) = im open to a relationship. After that, its just about personality compatability.
 
Looks are everything.

This is something that I don't want to be true, that I used to react viscerally to, and that I once thought morality would override. In fact I feel like a dick for even bringing it up today. But truth must take priority, and I'm going to have to sound like a dick to spread this helpful info. This will be in rant format because I don't have time for a structured essay. So here goes.
I've been a 3, I've been a 8, and along the way I've been everywhere in between. I've seen how people treat a wide range of men, because that's what I've been these past few years. And I've had days where I felt, even acted like a 3, when my looks were a few points higher. So let me tell you that the way you act matters much less than the way you look (in most circumstances).
Example: back in the day I tried using online dating and none of my pickup lines worked. I never got laid, and it was bad. Fast forward a couple years and now everyone swipes me right on tinder and I've got thousands of matches and I can't possibly sleep with all these women so I don't give a **** and often reuse some of my old pickup lines. Guess what? They work now. They all work now. I picked up a tinder 9 (real life 7.5) the other day with the Pythagorean theorem for ****'s sake. Just straight up "a2 + b2 = c2 ", her response was "That's the Pythagorean theorem", and I followed it with "yeah I'm a mathematician so give me your number" she responds with 3.1415 I call her a cutie pi and boom next thing you know she's measuring the circumference of my dick.
Same dynamic goes for real life interactions, though honestly tinder is so much faster/easier/cheaper that I might just make the switch to an all digital sex life.
And better yet, women often message me first. It's insane, really. You go your whole life beating yourself up over not being smooth enough to get the ladies, thinking its some mental or confidence issue, then you go and get ripped, and now you can act like a total dick and get nearly perfect results. ****, man. You were never insane, you were never personally ****** up, you were just ugly as hell... what a wake up call that was.
Have you ever said something totally stupid which turned into an awkward moment? If you're hot, no problem, just follow up the stupid thing with a handsome smirk and a smartass comment that takes it to the next level. Agree and amplify yourself and people will take it as a joke, if you're good looking. They'll think you're sarcastically ******* with them, and will have a moment of "hey, I see what you did there an am now in on the joke. This feels good because I now think there's a personal connection between me and this attractive man". Gets you out of the awkward situation 100% of the time and is a great subject changing opportunity to let you direct the convo. Wouldn't work as well if you're ugly.
Another thing: people's perception of your competence. If you're out of shape, people will skew their perception of you towards the loser scale, whereas if you're fit, people will hand you opportunities left and right. Looking for a job? Get in shape and you'll have better luck.
Think of a male role model of yours. Think of a few. How many of them are physically attractive? How many are out of shape?
So guys, if you're like I was and are questioning whether you've "got what it takes" to be an alpha male, let me tell you right now that you don't have a damn thing to worry about. Eat right, workout regularly, lift, and our image-obsessed society will propel you right up to the ranks of alpha whether you like it or not. Plus the process of getting in shape will change you and give you a confidence boost automatically. Then looking down from the top you'll realize how fake and hilarious everyone is, and that perspective shift will make you feel powerful as hell. The upward spiral is real, it's there, and it's waiting for you to make the first move.


Alright, final disclaimer: while looks are everything, you still need a compelling mission and a solid character. Looks are everything to the world around you, but your character is everything to yourself and everything you are. This life is yours, so get on good terms with society and then do what you came here to do.
 

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