Debate Q2: Do you (honestly) care what people think about you?

lexico said:
Hence there is validity when peopel say they don't give a damn. It is a promise that is self-fulfilling for the verbalizer. Exactly because, without saying it, they do give too much of a damn.
...this is something that i agree with.
i think the strive to be different (hence, not giving a damn) is one sought by many...and by trying to be different we tend to become similar. the reasons for wanting to be different are numerous and could probably fill it's own thread, but i think...without going into too much depth...it is relative to conformity and non-conformity.
personally i know i tried desperately not to conform and realised that i was conforming but in a different sense. i have touched upon this already in this thread so i will not dwell upon it.

although there is nothing wrong with wanting to be different, it is an up-hill struggle...as 'different' is defined in different (no pun intended) ways by different (...once again) people.

personally i believe for someone to 'truly' not give a damn...or 'truly' not to care of others opinion would be someone void of emotions and/or self-respect.
 
smoke said:
i think the strive to be different (hence, not giving a damn) is one sought by many...and by trying to be different we tend to become similar. the reasons for wanting to be different are numerous and could probably fill it's own thread, but i think...without going into too much depth...it is relative to conformity and non-conformity.
I remember that. Nothing new under the sun. They say it wasn't even Solomon who said it, but an old schoolmaster with a pessimist outlook on life. But is it good for the mental well being to abondon all hope ?
smoke said:
personally i believe for someone to 'truly' not give a damn...or 'truly' not to care of others opinion would be someone void of emotions and/or self-respect.
I often thought about the cause of numbness, and the physical analogy extends quite naturally into the psychology of the person. The widespread numbness today is said to be a modern phenomenon, or sickness if you will. The Terrorist, The Stranger both deal with the person who struggles to make sense once his senses are awakened. The Apocalypse Now shows how the void person becomes voided; a favourite topic for Doc the Assassin ? They can be seen as a verbal description of the state of lifelessness, when the ordinary feelings of the average citizen have gone dead.
 
lexico said:
I remember that. Nothing new under the sun. They say it wasn't even Solomon who said it, but an old schoolmaster with a pessimist outlook on life. But is it good for the mental well being to abondon all hope ?
I often thought about the cause of numbness, and the physical analogy extends quite naturally into the psychology of the person. The widespread numbness today is said to be a modern phenomenon, or sickness if you will. The Terrorist, The Stranger both deal with the person who struggles to make sense once his senses are awakened. The Apocalypse Now shows how the void person becomes voided; a favourite topic for Doc the Assassin ? They can be seen as a verbal description of the state of lifelessness, when the ordinary feelings of the average citizen have gone dead.

I think my signature explains it all Lexico.

Doc:ramen::happy:
 
smoke said:
.
personally i believe for someone to 'truly' not give a damn...or 'truly' not to care of others opinion would be someone void of emotions and/or self-respect.

True. But those people must be rare. I think, humans are biologically programmed (can I say that?) to try and "fit in" with the group - whatever the group is, it might be a family, or the friends in school or colleagues at work. We need to be surrounded by other people and we need them to approve and accept us. (Same; we need love to survive)
The need to be accepted by others makes us care about what others think.

The people who are lacking the emotions and/or self-respect don't feel they need to be accepted by others, and will therefore probably not care at all what others think. But question is.. in truth; is there ANYONE out there who is like this? I think every single person cares what others think about them, in some way or another...
 
isayhello said:
True. But those people must be rare. I think, humans are biologically programmed (can I say that?) to try and "fit in" with the group - whatever the group is, it might be a family, or the friends in school or colleagues at work. We need to be surrounded by other people and we need them to approve and accept us. (Same; we need love to survive)
The need to be accepted by others makes us care about what others think.

The people who are lacking the emotions and/or self-respect don't feel they need to be accepted by others, and will therefore probably not care at all what others think. But question is.. in truth; is there ANYONE out there who is like this? I think every single person cares what others think about them, in some way or another...
do you think vagrants care what others think?
the ones that chase can of special brew and piss themselves and sleep in McDonalds doorway.
i always wondered if they were bothered by peoples opinions!
as for needing to feel accepted...i believe there are some people that 'need' (i use that term a little loosely) the opposite. I have known people that have rebelled the acceptance...i suppose, in a way...there acceptance came from not being accepted.

and to be honest...i don't think there is anyone who is completely void of emotions and/or self respect.
 
smoke said:
do you think vagrants care what others think?
the ones that chase can of special brew and piss themselves and sleep in McDonalds doorway.
i always wondered if they were bothered by peoples opinions!
.

Good question.. I wondered that too. I think they DO care, only, they have sort of lost track of themselves and life. But somewhere, deep inside, they still care and would want more that anything else to live a healthier life. (?)
When a person is fighting for survival, the self-respect and need to be approved by others is lost, I think.
Some of them (the vagrants) might be on drugs or be alcoholics, and those things takes away a little of a persons self-respect. Especially drugs, since they can alter your personality and make you mentally ill. Then, you don't care anymore about others or their oppinions, but only about getting the drug you need, no matter what...
 
Yes

Regards,

?W????

(P.S. .... does this win me the car.....promised for the shortest post ?)
 
isayhello said:
Good question.. I wondered that too. I think they DO care, only, they have sort of lost track of themselves and life. But somewhere, deep inside, they still care and would want more that anything else to live a healthier life. (?)
When a person is fighting for survival, the self-respect and need to be approved by others is lost, I think.
Some of them (the vagrants) might be on drugs or be alcoholics, and those things takes away a little of a persons self-respect. Especially drugs, since they can alter your personality and make you mentally ill. Then, you don't care anymore about others or their oppinions, but only about getting the drug you need, no matter what...
i wonder if it's possible to become so low (or even high...sorry bad pun) that you do totally lose self-respect.
i think it would be impossible to become completely void of emotions...otherwise what sort of feeling would drugs or alcohol ofer.
 
smoke said:
i wonder if it's possible to become so low (or even high...sorry bad pun) that you do totally lose self-respect.
i think it would be impossible to become completely void of emotions...otherwise what sort of feeling would drugs or alcohol ofer.

Yes, but what you become apathetic? Then emotions really have no place in your life now do they?

Doc:ramen::happy:
 
Beyond family and really close friends, nope. People will form their opinions of you and rarely, if ever change them, no matter what you do to the contrary. Life is too damn short to worry about how the world perceives you, if you do worry about something as trivial as that, the next thing you know, you're wearing one of those funny white jackets with the buckles and ridiculously long sleeves. BAH! Who needs that?
 
yes, i do care about it.. i can say like it depens on person, but even when somebody doesnt know me, and say something to me i feel it... i think about it, if it is wrong or good,, sometimes after 10min i think what ever, i dont care...

when a familie member, or a good friend say it to me, it can hurt me, or i feel it !!!

i think sometimes im to young, and need to work on being more secure about myself....
 
If these are the people that i respect and whose bonds with i deeply treasure,what they think about me really matters a lot.
 
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i care about what other people think of me.

now, visiting my websites, it could be anyone, including people i do not share interests with.

there is a disclaimer, PG-13 and above, and the display SEGA/NINTENDO.

it is obviously my sites are not about cars/nice woman/lingerie. many people like these things, good, and i care if people get agressive!

means a xxxxxx no thanks! message makes people angry, unnecessarily!

aonther thing is the lifestyle of my visitors. i recently have tried to wrap several messages in normal text, without being untruthful. means i also stand for the original text.

i have built in riddles, which people may figure out if they read everything fifty times.

i care a lot if my language, graphical display is slanderous. however, i display PG-13, and this means, i utilize display/language structure which might be offensive/suggestive for underage persons.

this means my content is especially designed for display by the most different population groups. in case no interest is shared, the appreciate persons often leave out of own device.

the trick is not to push these persons by direct language, or negative language at all. they figure out themselves, that other sites may match their needs/interests better. in the best case, they forget everything, and do not come back.

i know some persons frequently say "i do not understand..."
the message i have is read everything fifty times, even more, until you get it. or do something different, what you understand right now.
 
I used to care what others think, but at my age I've found that it really doesn't matter what people think of you. If they dislike you, they are going to dislike you no matter what you do or how you try to change to meet their expectations. If they like you for who you are, they will like you regardless. The important thing is to not change who you really are inside. Be yourself and let the chips fall where they may. There are some people I know who I would not become close friends with because of their personality or attitude as it is quite opposite mine, but I do respect them for their convictions, and their honesty and truthfulness to stick to who and what they are.

It reminds me of something I read somewhere: I am not who I think I am and I am not who you think I am. I am what I think you think I am.

After I read this and digested it internally, I decided to just be me. :)
 
I still do somewhat and it depends on who I'm around, but as I get older I don't dwell on things as much. I think you should ask yourself should you care about something before doing, I'm not a fan of the individuals who are all Ego and no Id, or is it all Ego and no Super Ego? I can never get those sorted out...
 

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