Are sexual harassment laws for ugly and weak women ?

[Minty]

I just want to adress one point concerning sexual harrasment. In public in general, like tram, buses, metro, cinemas, clubs and many such other public places a man is very careful about touching, even by accident, a strange woman. I know I am. In club/bars for example a man may try to come and pik up a lady...but he will not touch her unless he feels he has consent...and even if he does happen to brush aside her by accident he will apologize in a manner to make it clear that it was an accident. However, if a woman touches a strange man by accident she will not go to the same lengths...and the man won't even bother to expect an apology or explanation. Women take more liberty in such things. For example in clubs i always remember girls walkin past me and having no trouble or second thoughts putting their hands on my shoulder to signal me to move by or what. I think women have much freedom in this sense.

Actually I always apologise if I accidentally touch people in public , male or female, except if they are little children and they don't watch where they are going and bump right into me, it happens from time to time in hypermarkets, I just look at them and wave my finger and say "non, non"

Whenever somebody bumps into me whether it is men or women, they apologise. I asked my husband about his experience as a man, he says yes if women accidentally touch or bump into him they apologize. Maybe different men have different experiences or are Belgian people's behaviour different from French?:?

 

[Minty]

Minty, they both are feminist issues, different but related.

:relief: Ok right, then when I disagree with the ugly, I mean for sexual harassment laws only, because sexual discrimination laws are being used by the ugly due to their jealousy towards the beauties actually does make sense.

 

[Minty]

A lot of women complain about having men being shallow and judging on looks and what not...but women do the same. I remember in school especially girls were the ones that left other girls out of their groups because they were not cute enough or what not...or they wouldn't invite certain people to their parties because they weren't popular enough and so forth. Even more so there are so many women out there who use their looks to their advantage. They just smile at some poor guy and get their way...oh buy a me a drink ? How many times i have heard some girls say this. I find it hypocritical that on one side u degrate yourself based on your look and then if in an another occasion it doesn't work out you complain about men being shallow and preferring beauty and what not.

I wrote this in another thread but I will reuse what I wrote again here:
If I am to tell you I don't label people on how they dress I would be a lying. When you see a worn, seedy person with messy hair walking in town, you mechanically categorise him, file him away under a particular title or heading. I believe this is the nature of human nature; the nature to judge the book by its cover.
It's doleful really, that we do this. We, as human beings, live on an exceedingly surface foundation for day-to-day life. Seldom do we dig to what is under the skin as many human relationships rarely turn near enough for one to do so.
I am indictable of labelling people by how they dress, stereotyping, categorising. I am afraid it is very hard not do label people by their cover because I believe it physiologically impossible to do so.
_________________________________________________________________
New comments:
I actually don't have a problem with men liking beautiful women, I like to look at beautiful women too, and they are such a work of art. But I like the law there to protect women out there who truly have been discriminated against of not able to get jobs because the industry favours men, or in the sexual harassment case if it is just a smile, wink and praise it's not so bad, but in some cases the men go over that and it is scary and uncomfortable.

 

[Minty]

You don't need to be beautiful/handsome to be sexy. These are two very different things. Likewise not all (not even most) beautiful people are sexy. For instance, a very beautiful woman that is too cold and serious, doesn't care about clothing and doesn't wear make-up may not be sexy. Sexisness is more about one's will to arouse other people. It's in the mind and in the style, not really in the physical beauty.

I agree that if a woman don't like sex and acts serious all day with no effort to keep her weight down is not sexy or attractive. However some women just don't have the sex appeal, a good comparison is Princess Diana versus Princess Anne. They both do a lot of charities, but Princess Diana was by far more popular than Princess Anne.

However there are ugly or unpopular people with high sex drive, my husband told me that he had colleagues who couldn't get girlfriends because they are not popular and cool enough, and they often pay for prostitution.

Hmmm so men associate women who wear make up, mini skirts, low cut dresses that show cleavages...etc as somebody who has high sex drives?

Because I think there are unattractive ladies, who like sex too, but they are not necessarily able to overcome their weight problem, or if they are born with an unattractive face they are kind of stuck with it, not everybody can afford plastic surgeries. I know some women who like to go clubbing but they are not attractive but they still like to go and try to get men there.

 

[Ma Cherie]

Sexual harassment laws are for women who are frustrated because they're not attractive enough and they're jealous of women who are more attractive because they are getting attention? :? I guess this issue is worth looking into, but I'm having hard time believing this. But anywho I guess that's just me.

I was under the impression that sexual harassment laws were to protect women from unwanted sexual treatment.

 

[Minty]

Sexual harassment laws are for women who are frustrated because they're not attractive enough and they're jealous of women who are more attractive because they are getting attention? :? I guess this issue is worth looking into, but I'm having hard time believing this. But anywho I guess that's just me.
I was under the impression that sexual harassment laws were to protect women from unwanted sexual treatment.

No it is not just you; it doesn't make sense to me either. Unattractive, ugly women do not get sexually harassed, but if we are talking about sexual discrimination law it actually is possible that unattractive women can possibly use this to get back at men who favour attractive women.

 

[Duo]

I think this has also to do with the core insecurity in women. I find it that these days a lot of girls my age do not feel at peace with themselves, with their appearance and their personality. They feel as if they have to be a certain way so that they please men, and this makes it easier for them to be more "giving" when a man they may like shows sings of attention their way.

whops..i forgot to finish this post ....

As I was saying i think in today's society people are way more look concious so i could see these laws being used as a means to restore confidence in one's ego

 

[Minty]

I think this has also to do with the core insecurity in women. I find it that these days a lot of girls my age do not feel at peace with themselves, with their appearance and their personality. They feel as if they have to be a certain way so that they please men, and this makes it easier for them to be more "giving" when a man they may like shows sings of attention their way.
whops..i forgot to finish this post ....
As I was saying i think in today's society people are way more look concious so i could see these laws being used as a means to restore confidence in one's ego

I think the media is to be blamed for these insecurities of looks among women. My husband says this is only the case among teens or young adults, most men in their middle age or older don't like "skinny women."

But of course what makes a woman sexually attractive is not just about weight, facial features and figures are part of it too.

 

[Ma Cherie]

I think the media is to be blamed for these insecurities of looks among women. My husband says this is only the case among teens or young adults, most men in their middle age or older don't like "skinny women."
But of course what makes a woman sexually attractive is not just about weight, facial features and figures are part of it too.

I agree with you on this one. It's difficult for a woman (especially women) to live up to the standards of beauty that the media bombards her with. I also have noticed when it comes to issues of body image, we're often asked, "what part of your body would you change?" How about, "what part of your body do you find sexy?" These insecurities do encourage people to embrace their own beauty and what makes them unique. And I think that's sad.

 

[Maciamo]

I think the media is to be blamed for these insecurities of looks among women. My husband says this is only the case among teens or young adults, most men in their middle age or older don't like "skinny women."

But is this a difference of age or generation ? Will young people now keep thinking that as they get older ?

 

[Minty]

I agree with you on this one. It's difficult for a woman (especially women) to live up to the standards of beauty that the media bombards her with. I also have noticed when it comes to issues of body image, we're often asked, "what part of your body would you change?" How about, "what part of your body do you find sexy?" These insecurities do encourage people to embrace their own beauty and what makes them unique. And I think that's sad.

And all these are responsible for women who ended up being bulimics and anorexics.

 

[Minty]

But is this a difference of age or generation ? Will young people now keep thinking that as they get older ?

Young men and teens prefer skinny women like the ones shown in magazines, but men like normal women, the ones that are not too skinny and not too fat. Men like curvy average build women.

I think teenagers or young men will change their minds as they get older.

When I was younger I was also more concern about being skinny because I felt that?fs what people liked, but as I grow older my view have changed.

There are always exceptions though.

 

[pretty women]

We can argue till the end of eternity what beautiful is or is not; always reaching the same conclusion that it is all in the eye of he or she who does the beholding yet in my opinion and I would venture to wager that I am not the only one to say that Scottish singer Susan Boyle is what in common terms can be referred to as “ugly”. This being the conclusion I reached after seeing her face which is miles from what I or most people, though I dare say not all would consider to be attractive.

This I say not to pass on insult to this lady from the highlands but to present a point, and that being that when a person is for the most part considered ugly or in kinder words unsightly, many will start to consider if they perhaps have not been compensated by other attributes. These perhaps taking the shape of a pleasant personality or perhaps intelligence or ability of some kind or another. In the case of Susan Boyle, it clearly being her voice which has earned her some fame along with praise specially after her appearance on the television program “Britain’s Got Talent”. It being on this program where she performed what could be hailed as a note perfect rendition of the song “I Dreamed A Dream” from the Broadway musical “Les Misérables”.

 

[Robert Devid Baker]

I don't think so its only for ugly or weak women.Sexual harassment laws are for those who are suffered from Unwanted sexual teasing, or shown Sexually suggestive signals from someone.It's right to say that ugly woman can't be attractive so that they can't get so much attraction like the other women have.But we can't say that this law is only for the ugly or weak women.