That's the sensational take away by most people after the WHO claimed, upon review of the research, that processed meats cause cancer.

It's bunk, in my opinion. First of all, it's not just bacon, but all cured meats. Second of all, the worst offenders are the nitrates and nitrites with which most modern "cured" meats are prepared. Traditionally, these were salted and air dried, no chemicals were involved. So, if you want to be "healthier" you should go for the traditional varieties of these meats. "Organic" non treated varieties are available, if more expensive. Traditional "European" versions are also available. (Ironically American food safety regulations forbade the importation of prosciutto and mortadella for years. You still can't import culatello.)

They do also indict all "red" meat as being implicated in cancer.

Honestly, I don't know about anyone else, but I'm getting tired of this unrelenting drum beat against virtually anything that anyone would want to eat.

Does anyone really want to live to be 100 if it means you're going to be miserable every day of your life because all you can eat is rabbit food? Also, I have news for them, too much water can kill you.

I come from an area where the women, especially, seem to live forever....well, into their nineties at least.
They eat red meat, if in moderation, especially pork and veal, lots of cured meats, along with chicken, eggs, fish occasionally, bread (usually white), pasta, vegetables, fruits, nuts, use a lot of olive oil, drink a little wine, walk a lot, and have supportive loving family and friends. That's the recipe I would give for a long life.

Oh, having good genes helps. Trust me on this one, you can do absolutely everything "right", and if you inherited a "bad" mutation, or one occurred in you, that's it. All of these proscriptions won't help you.

It's also not a good idea to knowingly expose yourself to lots of environmental pollutants.

That's it.