Women of 50 are invisible to me

[Angela]

Ok, Angela, I will shut up and read.
I thought Dirty Dancing was one of the lamest movies ever to become a hit, but I now realize that there is a reason for everything I simply didn't get before.

I don't know quite what you mean. Talk away; we're a community here.

As for "Dirty Dancing", I think you may have to be a woman to really "get it". :bigsmile:
I've heard it described as soft porn for women. I don't think that's accurate. The sex is by no means graphic enough. It's romantic sex, but more importantly, it's a fairy tale love story for women where the tables are turned and the rich but rather plain girl saves the gorgeous, sexy, lower class man. The dancing is also spectacular, especially the "dirty dancing". Are there women who don't love a man who can dance and make them feel gorgeous and sexy while they're dancing? I don't think so.

Patrick Swayze starred in another movie that women love: Ghost.

I could give you a whole list of them off the top of my head, but an internet list is easier.
https://www.imdb.com/list/ls000054490/

I would take out Sex and the City, which I hated, and When Harry Met Sally, but other than that I have no quarrel with the list. What's missing is Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre, Persuasion, An Affair to Remember, The English Patient, Bridges of Madison County, Lady Hawk, Camelot, and Beauty and the Beast, just off the top of my head. Some are great stand alone movies, others are not. Most show no sex at all, but they all get to most women.

 

[firetown]

I don't know quite what you mean. Talk away; we're a community here.

As for "Dirty Dancing", I think you may have to be a woman to really "get it". :bigsmile:
I've heard it described as soft porn for women. I don't think that's accurate. The sex is by no means graphic enough. It's romantic sex, but more importantly, it's a fairy tale love story for women where the tables are turned and the rich but rather plain girl saves the gorgeous, sexy, lower class man. The dancing is also spectacular, especially the "dirty dancing". Are there women who don't love a man who can dance and make them feel gorgeous and sexy while they're dancing? I don't think so.

Patrick Swayze starred in another movie that women love: Ghost.

I could give you a whole list of them off the top of my head, but an internet list is easier.
https://www.imdb.com/list/ls000054490/

I would take out Sex and the City, which I hated, and When Harry Met Sally, but other than that I have no quarrel with the list. What's missing is Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre, Persuasion, An Affair to Remember, The English Patient, Bridges of Madison County, Lady Hawk, Camelot, and Beauty and the Beast, just off the top of my head. Some are great stand alone movies, others are not. Most show no sex at all, but they all get to most women.

This list has no vampire or werewolves movies and Pirates of the Caribbeans is missing.

Honestly, this list seems silly. Who were the women polled?
It read to me more like a list of 25 movies male writers think that women must love.
Ghost, btw. is one of the few movies I actually do consider a masterpiece as it was so well written, acted, directed and done on every level.
And yes, the emotional impact of it is intense. I think it is one of those movies many men "secretly love".

 

[Angela]

This list has no vampire or werewolves movies and Pirates of the Caribbeans is missing.

Honestly, this list seems silly. Who were the women polled?
It read to me more like a list of 25 movies male writers think that women must love.
Ghost, btw. is one of the few movies I actually do consider a masterpiece as it was so well written, acted, directed and done on every level.
And yes, the emotional impact of it is intense. I think it is one of those movies many men "secretly love".

As I said, some of them are just great movies across the Board, others are so called "Chick Flicks", not "great" film. That site may be using commentary or upvotes by women; I don't know. I highly doubt they were chosen by men; to think so is rather dismissive of the tastes of women in film don't you think? Men have their own version of "chick flicks", and I don't disparage them. It's just the way it is.

I assure you that women love those movies, no matter the age. My daughter is in her 20s, and she and her friends watch some of these over and over again. When we have "movie night" together I join her. Some of these films never get old. Are they fantasy? Yes, to a degree.

Let's take "The Notebook" as an example. Are most relationships like that today? Are all men as devoted to their wives? No, they're not, but some are. My parents had that kind of marriage. There were many marriages like that in my extended family, and my husband's. His aunt and uncle, in their 80s, both in failing health, just walked into an assisted living facility hand in hand after 60 years of marriage. It's what a lot of women want, even if it is becoming increasingly rare.

As for Peterson's commentary, he's talking about a different type of book or film which women like. He's talking about the kind of "pornography" which women consume. First off, all women don't consume it. Second of all, if you were to read a Harlequin "romance" or any other of what they call the "bodice ripper" books, I doubt you'd call them pornography. I guess that's why they call it "soft porn". Peterson is correct about the basic plot line: aggressive, attractive, powerful man is seduced by sweet woman who softens and tames him. I guess the Twilight movies, which younger women do like, would fit that scenario, although the vampire is so effeminate it's not a particularly good example, imo. I much preferred the version with Frank Langella. Probably the 50 Shades of Grey franchise fits this scenario, and women did like it, although I didn't. No way do I find the idea of being physically abused appealing, and in addition I thought there was almost zero actual chemistry between those two actors. In that regard, studies show that S&M in relationships are almost exclusively initiated by men, and it's extraordinarily rare in lesbian relationships.

In fact, the men who make movies based on this scenario sometimes get it wrong because they go too far. Troy is one example, imo. Leaving aside that Brad Pitt isn't my ideal, he's too brutal to her to be sexually appealing. 365 days, which features an extraordinarily gorgeous and sexy man, again wasn't one of my favorites, or my daughter's, because he was too controlling; most women don't want to be literally imprisoned, and the sex was too graphic for me. I like the old movie with Deborah Kerr and Yul Brynner much better, and they never actually had sex. It helped he was one of the sexiest men to have ever lived.

 

[firetown]

studies show that S&M in relationships are almost exclusively initiated by men,

I am not into that but have been "asked" to participate. By women. Yes, many had a history if you will. Possibly reenactment. Not just possibly... but still.

 

[Silesian]

Don't know this subject(sm) in relation to 50s age group and long term bonding in family setting.
However, I really liked Jordan Peterson interview with Stephen J Shaw-- The epidemic that dare not speak. (demographics of being old and alone)