Ethics Who punishes promiscuous women?

Bicicleur, with all due respect, you don't understand women, which is certainly normal for a man. :)

If a voluptuous woman with a great figure puts on a tiny bikini and goes prancing around men in a married couples setting, she's doing it for the effect, to be admired. She might not want to have sex with them, but she certainly wants their attention. Another woman, with an equally beautiful body, let's say, might not want that kind of ogling and attention from the husbands of her friends or from their teenage sons. She might find it extremely uncomfortable, and might not like being "hit on" by these men. It's also a question of respect in some cases, respect for the women of her acquaintance.

The women who resent it are not necessarily less attractive. They're just realistic. A man can have steak at home and still consider having filet mignon occasionally. Most women instinctively know this, although not all. I know a woman, a very attractive woman, who spent a fortune on maintaining her looks: a tummy tuck after each baby, breast lifts, discrete wrinkle removal, hours at the spa every week, you name it. She was universally considered gorgeous, yet her husband was constantly cheating. It was about him, not her.

Why do you think a lot of women, even if they can afford it, either don't want live in help, or at least don't want to hire young, attractive nannies. It doesn't matter if the wife is attactive or not. Even hiring an older, unattractive woman is not always a guarantee. Look at Arnold Schwartzenegger.

you're right, I'm a man and I don't understand women
those who I'm interested in, I try to understand them as an individual

I do understand though, many of them like to parade and be admired
and I also understand men, at least most of them

I can tell you, those women who are afraid of that lady in the bikini at the spa and think it threatens their marriage or influences their children in a bad way, their mind is ****** up
I'm sorry, these women don't understand men, they even understand their own husband, unless it is a perverted one (they do exist, but are a minority), and in this case, they should concentrate their anger to their husband, not to the lady in question, as a matter of fact, they shouldn't have taken this husband at all
 
I can tell you, those women who are afraid of that lady in the bikini at the spa and think it threatens their marriage or influences their children in a bad way, their mind is ****** up
I'm sorry, these women don't understand men, they even understand their own husband, unless it is a perverted one (they do exist, but are a minority), and in this case, they should concentrate their anger to their husband, not to the lady in question, as a matter of fact, they shouldn't have taken this husband at all
I'll have to politely disagree with you. "Those women" or any woman in the world has a reason to be afraid and suspicious because this is reality, men cheat.

There's many opinions why men cheat and mine is because of their own weakness which lets say half of it is their fault and half the modern society. Modern society is creating weak effeminate men who are so encouraged to use their wits and forget about manly honour and pride so they'd start arguing and shouting at a woman or even worse use violence to impose their dominance. That just means they're weak and they have a need for recognition.

Weakness causes you to lower your expectations and choose someone as a partner because you can't do better, but the moment they start to do well and take care of themselves they look for an upgrade.

As Chillon of Sparta said in 6th century BC: "If one is strong be also merciful, so that one's neighbors may respect one rather than fear one." The strong men that I looked up to growing up never had to show it, everybody knew and that made them the chillest among many. Men like this will vastly the % of promiscuous women, yet it doesn't guarantee that all these men will be loyal too.

...unless it is a perverted one (they do exist, but are a minority)
The majority of men (if not all) are as perverted as they get, together with women. It's the stuff that'd fed to you since you were a kid that makes you different, as well as to whom you direct your perverted thoughts to (your partner or the entire world).
 
Bicicleur, a lot of men cheat, not a small minority, and most don't even want a divorce. The standard explanation if caught is "It doesn't mean anything." I used to think it was a crock of you know what, but perhaps in a way it's true for some. Men can more eaily divorce their sexuality from their feelings.

Goodness knows I'm not excusing it; I just think it's reality.
 
I'll have to politely disagree with you. "Those women" or any woman in the world has a reason to be afraid and suspicious because this is reality, men cheat.

There's many opinions why men cheat and mine is because of their own weakness which lets say half of it is their fault and half the modern society. Modern society is creating weak effeminate men who are so encouraged to use their wits and forget about manly honour and pride so they'd start arguing and shouting at a woman or even worse use violence to impose their dominance. That just means they're weak and they have a need for recognition.

Weakness causes you to lower your expectations and choose someone as a partner because you can't do better, but the moment they start to do well and take care of themselves they look for an upgrade.

As Chillon of Sparta said in 6th century BC: "If one is strong be also merciful, so that one's neighbors may respect one rather than fear one." The strong men that I looked up to growing up never had to show it, everybody knew and that made them the chillest among many. Men like this will vastly the % of promiscuous women, yet it doesn't guarantee that all these men will be loyal too.


The majority of men (if not all) are as perverted as they get, together with women. It's the stuff that'd fed to you since you were a kid that makes you different, as well as to whom you direct your perverted thoughts to (your partner or the entire world).

men cheat, that is right, it's nature

but not just because they see a woman in bikini in a spa

come on
 
Bicicleur, a lot of men cheat, not a small minority, and most don't even want a divorce. The standard explanation if caught is "It doesn't mean anything." I used to think it was a crock of you know what, but perhaps in a way it's true for some. Men can more eaily divorce their sexuality from their feelings.
Goodness knows I'm not excusing it; I just think it's reality.

yes, the vast majority of men will cheat when they get a good opportunity
but does it mean they are perverts?

what is a pervert?
I would say a pervert does things to a woman he enjoys only himself, and uses force to the woman in one way or another
 
oh yes the vast majority of men
I can tell many men even think of themselves they will never cheat, untill they suddenly get that opportunity
and if that happens, will they all of a sudden become less devoted to their wife and family? I doubt it
 
yes, the vast majority of men will cheat when they get the opportunity
but does it mean they are perverts?

No, I don't think they are "perverts".

Maybe we have a misunderstanding. Let's go back to my example. It's a family club. A voluptuous woman always wears a tiny bikini to the pool. You don't think a lot of the men who are inclined to cheat might see this as a subtle invitation, an indication that perhaps she's "available"? Wouldn't a man perhaps then be more likely to discretely ask her to meet him for lunch, or to give her a cell phone number for "future reference" etc., etc.?

Now, I've never known of any kind of "dress code" for the pool, but if an attractive woman dresses like that around other women's husbands, she may jeopardize her female friendships. It's just the way it is: women are territorial too, if not as territorial as men.

I was thinking about whether there would be the same reaction if a man appeared wearing one of those little "pouch" suits. I'm used to it, but I can tell you that northeastern Americans would be very uncomfortable. They're more into baggy shorts. :) Some people might indeed complain.

This is all culture specific probably. This is common in Italy, as is women going topless in some areas.
 
No, I don't think they are "perverts".
Maybe we have a misunderstanding. Let's go back to my example. It's a family club. A voluptuous woman always wears a tiny bikini to the pool. You don't think a lot of the men who are inclined to cheat might see this as a subtle invitation, an indication that perhaps she's "available"? Wouldn't a man perhaps then be more likely to discretely ask her to meet him for lunch, or to give her a cell phone number for "future reference" etc., etc.?
Now, I've never known of any kind of "dress code" for the pool, but if an attractive woman dresses like that around other women's husbands, she may jeopardize her female friendships. It's just the way it is: women are territorial too, if not as territorial as men.
I was thinking about whether there would be the same reaction if a man appeared wearing one of those little "pouch" suits. I'm used to it, but I can tell you that northeastern Americans would be very uncomfortable. They're more into baggy shorts. :) Some people might indeed complain.
This is all culture specific probably. This is common in Italy, as is women going topless in some areas.
Angela, I told you man think with the body part that contains the most blood.
Yet, I think you underestimate them a little bit.
They won't see a lady in bikini as an invitation, they understand that women like to parade, and probably the lady also feels more confortable in a bikini than in a full bathing suit. Maybe she's just working on her tan.
But if this lady realy would sent out an invitation, I think very few man would refuse if they could get away with that.
However any sensible man knows she doesn't.
Unless his mind is ****** up, which is sometimes cultural rather than just nature.
I mean, some cultures have to many rules for contact between man and woman, that men don't know any more how to deal with that.
Those rules have an effect that is not helping, it becomes counterproductive and even dangerous.
 
OK Angela, here is the study I suggest you read:

Baumeister, R. F., & Twenge, J. M. (2002). Cultural suppression of female sexuality. Review of General Psychology, 6(2), 166-203.


It can be easily located and downloaded through google scholar. Although I'll encourage you to read the study in its entirety, here's the abstract:

Four theories about cultural suppression of female sexuality are evaluated. Data are reviewed on cross-cultural differences in power and sex ratios, reactions to the sexual revolution, direct restraining influences on adolescent and adult female sexuality,double standard patterns of sexual morality, female genital surgery, legal and religious restrictions on sex, prostitution and pornography, and sexual deception. The view that men suppress female sexuality received hardly any support and is flatly contradicted by some findings. Instead, the evidence favors the view that women have worked to stifle each other’s sexuality because sex is a limited resource that women use to negotiate with men, and scarcity gives women an advantage.
In other words, it isn't than men never enforce cultural norms on female behavior, but rather, that the preponderance of the evidence very heavily supports the idea that females themselves are driving those cultural norms. This may be why feminism stumbled and broke into factions over issues related to prostitution and pornography; some feminists pushed for individual women's freedom, but the rest pushed for the power of the sisterhood.
 
OK Angela, here is the study I suggest you read:

Baumeister, R. F., & Twenge, J. M. (2002). Cultural suppression of female sexuality. Review of General Psychology, 6(2), 166-203.


It can be easily located and downloaded through google scholar. Although I'll encourage you to read the study in its entirety, here's the abstract:


In other words, it isn't than men never enforce cultural norms on female behavior, but rather, that the preponderance of the evidence very heavily supports the idea that females themselves are driving those cultural norms. This may be why feminism stumbled and broke into factions over issues related to prostitution and pornography; some feminists pushed for individual women's freedom, but the rest pushed for the power of the sisterhood.

Thanks. I'll definitely read it. :)
 
Angela, women cheat just as often as men. Marriage as an institution is very constraining when it comes to sex. So partners sometimes stray. It is when it veers off into love that it becomes threatening to your partner. Or when she's really great in bed. :embarassed: I have had some very attractive partners that were total cold fish in bed. Some others were dynamite. I wonder what my ex partners would say about me behind my back:LOL:.
 
Angela, women cheat just as often as men. Marriage as an institution is very constraining when it comes to sex. So partners sometimes stray. It is when it veers off into love that it becomes threatening to your partner. Or when she's really great in bed. :embarassed: I have had some very attractive partners that were total cold fish in bed. Some others were dynamite. I wonder what my ex partners would say about me behind my back:LOL:.

Not in my experience, but maybe it's just the circle of married women with whom I'm friendly. I only know two women who have cheated on their husbands. All the rest are faithful, so far as I know, and women talk. Or maybe it's also partly a generational thing.

I take that back. One of my college dorm mates cheats on her husband, so that's three, but I don't like her very much, for that and other reasons.

I'm surprised Greek women would be cold blooded or a lot of them, anyway.

I can tell you that if a woman doesn't like food she doesn't like sex. Controlling the liking is one thing, not much liking it is another. I think it has to do with the strenth of your desire for sense satisfaction. That's my scientific observation. :)

If you can laugh at yourself, probably good things. :)
 
:LOL:
Not in my experience, but maybe it's just the circle of married women with whom I'm friendly. I only know two women who have cheated on their husbands. All the rest are faithful, so far as I know, and women talk. Or maybe it's also partly a generational thing.

I take that back. One of my college dorm mates cheats on her husband, so that's three, but I don't like her very much, for that and other reasons.

I'm surprised Greek women would be cold blooded or a lot of them, anyway.

I can tell you that if a woman doesn't like food she doesn't like sex. Controlling the liking is one thing, not much liking it is another. I think it has to do with the strenth of your desire for sense satisfaction. That's my scientific observation. :)

If you can laugh at yourself, probably good things. :)

Oh they are red blooded but only when you're having an argument...well not quite an argument, it is usually one sided, they yell at you and you try to act civilized:LOL:.

There was a poll I think some time ago and the percentages of cheating were very close. In the US the cheating percentages drop, but the divorce rates go up.
 
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:LOL:

Oh they are hot blooded but only when you're having an argument...well not quite an argument, it is usually one sided, they yell at you and you try to act civilized:LOL:.

There was a poll I think some time ago and the percentages of cheating were very close. In the US the cheating percentages drop, but the divorce rates go up.

Italian men yell back, and it usually ends in a...reconciliation, shall we say. :) My husband admits he used to set me off on purpose. He said he liked to see the "sparks" fly. Then he would laugh, which would just infuriate me more. :)

Once we had an argument, believe it or not, over the fact that he called my name incessantly when he was home: to get something for him; to see something; to listen to something; to tell him where something was, which he couldn't find, but which was right under his nose. It was endless, like a child calling his mother all day, except that we had no "real" children yet. I couldn't get a damn thing done. It was worse if he tried, for once, to do "manly" jobs around the house. I would have to stand right next to him to be "assistant". I threatened to get in the car and go to my friend's house for the week-end if he didn't leave me alone and give me some peace. The next day he did it even more. At one point late in the afternoon I exploded: I told him I'd stab him to death with my Chef's knife if he didn't leave me alone. (I know: I'm confirming all the stereotypes. Of course I didn't actually mean to do it.) At that point I heard him laughing maniacally upstairs.

 
:grin:
Italian men yell back, and it usually ends in a...reconciliation, shall we say. :) My husband admits he used to set me off on purpose. He said he liked to see the "sparks" fly. Then he would laugh, which would just infuriate me more. :)

Once we had an argument, believe it or not, over the fact that he called my name incessantly when he was home: to get something for him; to see something; to listen to something; to tell him where something was, which he couldn't find, but which was right under his nose. It was endless, like a child calling his mother all day, except that we had no "real" children yet. I couldn't get a damn thing done. It was worse if he tried, for once, to do "manly" jobs around the house. I would have to stand right next to him to be "assistant". I threatened to get in the car and go to my friend's house for the week-end if he didn't leave me alone and give me some peace. The next day he did it even more. At one point late in the afternoon I exploded: I told him I'd stab him to death with my Chef's knife if he didn't leave me alone. (I know: I'm confirming all the stereotypes. Of course I didn't actually mean to do it.) At that point I heard him laughing maniacally upstairs.


Remind me not to use your name too often Angela:embarassed:.
 
Men can more easily divorce their sexuality from their feelings.
Goodness knows I'm not excusing it; I just think it's reality.


I believe this can be 100% true for many of us men until we see the hurt we inflict on our better halves. We're wired differently but probably not a great excuse for our behavior as a whole. On the other hand, promiscuous women seem to make the world go round. :)
 
Not in my experience, but maybe it's just the circle of married women with whom I'm friendly. I only know two women who have cheated on their husbands. All the rest are faithful, so far as I know, and women talk. Or maybe it's also partly a generational thing.

I take that back. One of my college dorm mates cheats on her husband, so that's three, but I don't like her very much, for that and other reasons.

I'm surprised Greek women would be cold blooded or a lot of them, anyway.

I can tell you that if a woman doesn't like food she doesn't like sex. Controlling the liking is one thing, not much liking it is another. I think it has to do with the strenth of your desire for sense satisfaction. That's my scientific observation. :)

If you can laugh at yourself, probably good things. :)

as far as you know, as far as women talk
 
I think cheating depends on the man and the woman themselves instead of numbers. I just feel that most couples in the world are not really meant to be together and they do it at the beginning for convention or solitude/boredom. You dont cheat over true love, love that you worked out a lot to bloom. Even though you would break up at some point because you happened to a crossroad, there still would be love and respect for the other.
 
Men can more easily divorce their sexuality from their feelings.
Goodness knows I'm not excusing it; I just think it's reality.


I believe this can be 100% true for many of us men until we see the hurt we inflict on our better halves. We're wired differently but probably not a great excuse for our behavior as a whole. On the other hand, promiscuous women seem to make the world go round. :)

Are you as a Man juging yourself and your kind and applausing at Woman who are doing the same? Do you know that women are hating guys like that, a lot?
 

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