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Thread: Who punishes promiscuous women?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela View Post
    Bicicleur, a lot of men cheat, not a small minority, and most don't even want a divorce. The standard explanation if caught is "It doesn't mean anything." I used to think it was a crock of you know what, but perhaps in a way it's true for some. Men can more eaily divorce their sexuality from their feelings.
    Goodness knows I'm not excusing it; I just think it's reality.
    yes, the vast majority of men will cheat when they get a good opportunity
    but does it mean they are perverts?

    what is a pervert?
    I would say a pervert does things to a woman he enjoys only himself, and uses force to the woman in one way or another

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    oh yes the vast majority of men
    I can tell many men even think of themselves they will never cheat, untill they suddenly get that opportunity
    and if that happens, will they all of a sudden become less devoted to their wife and family? I doubt it

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    Quote Originally Posted by bicicleur View Post
    yes, the vast majority of men will cheat when they get the opportunity
    but does it mean they are perverts?
    No, I don't think they are "perverts".

    Maybe we have a misunderstanding. Let's go back to my example. It's a family club. A voluptuous woman always wears a tiny bikini to the pool. You don't think a lot of the men who are inclined to cheat might see this as a subtle invitation, an indication that perhaps she's "available"? Wouldn't a man perhaps then be more likely to discretely ask her to meet him for lunch, or to give her a cell phone number for "future reference" etc., etc.?

    Now, I've never known of any kind of "dress code" for the pool, but if an attractive woman dresses like that around other women's husbands, she may jeopardize her female friendships. It's just the way it is: women are territorial too, if not as territorial as men.

    I was thinking about whether there would be the same reaction if a man appeared wearing one of those little "pouch" suits. I'm used to it, but I can tell you that northeastern Americans would be very uncomfortable. They're more into baggy shorts. :) Some people might indeed complain.

    This is all culture specific probably. This is common in Italy, as is women going topless in some areas.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela View Post
    No, I don't think they are "perverts".
    Maybe we have a misunderstanding. Let's go back to my example. It's a family club. A voluptuous woman always wears a tiny bikini to the pool. You don't think a lot of the men who are inclined to cheat might see this as a subtle invitation, an indication that perhaps she's "available"? Wouldn't a man perhaps then be more likely to discretely ask her to meet him for lunch, or to give her a cell phone number for "future reference" etc., etc.?
    Now, I've never known of any kind of "dress code" for the pool, but if an attractive woman dresses like that around other women's husbands, she may jeopardize her female friendships. It's just the way it is: women are territorial too, if not as territorial as men.
    I was thinking about whether there would be the same reaction if a man appeared wearing one of those little "pouch" suits. I'm used to it, but I can tell you that northeastern Americans would be very uncomfortable. They're more into baggy shorts. :) Some people might indeed complain.
    This is all culture specific probably. This is common in Italy, as is women going topless in some areas.
    Angela, I told you man think with the body part that contains the most blood.
    Yet, I think you underestimate them a little bit.
    They won't see a lady in bikini as an invitation, they understand that women like to parade, and probably the lady also feels more confortable in a bikini than in a full bathing suit. Maybe she's just working on her tan.
    But if this lady realy would sent out an invitation, I think very few man would refuse if they could get away with that.
    However any sensible man knows she doesn't.
    Unless his mind is ****** up, which is sometimes cultural rather than just nature.
    I mean, some cultures have to many rules for contact between man and woman, that men don't know any more how to deal with that.
    Those rules have an effect that is not helping, it becomes counterproductive and even dangerous.

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    1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.
    OK Angela, here is the study I suggest you read:

    Baumeister, R. F., & Twenge, J. M. (2002). Cultural suppression of female sexuality. Review of General Psychology, 6(2), 166-203.


    It can be easily located and downloaded through google scholar. Although I'll encourage you to read the study in its entirety, here's the abstract:

    Four theories about cultural suppression of female sexuality are evaluated. Data are reviewed on cross-cultural differences in power and sex ratios, reactions to the sexual revolution, direct restraining influences on adolescent and adult female sexuality,double standard patterns of sexual morality, female genital surgery, legal and religious restrictions on sex, prostitution and pornography, and sexual deception. The view that men suppress female sexuality received hardly any support and is flatly contradicted by some findings. Instead, the evidence favors the view that women have worked to stifle each other’s sexuality because sex is a limited resource that women use to negotiate with men, and scarcity gives women an advantage.
    In other words, it isn't than men never enforce cultural norms on female behavior, but rather, that the preponderance of the evidence very heavily supports the idea that females themselves are driving those cultural norms. This may be why feminism stumbled and broke into factions over issues related to prostitution and pornography; some feminists pushed for individual women's freedom, but the rest pushed for the power of the sisterhood.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Vandemonian View Post
    OK Angela, here is the study I suggest you read:

    Baumeister, R. F., & Twenge, J. M. (2002). Cultural suppression of female sexuality. Review of General Psychology, 6(2), 166-203.


    It can be easily located and downloaded through google scholar. Although I'll encourage you to read the study in its entirety, here's the abstract:


    In other words, it isn't than men never enforce cultural norms on female behavior, but rather, that the preponderance of the evidence very heavily supports the idea that females themselves are driving those cultural norms. This may be why feminism stumbled and broke into factions over issues related to prostitution and pornography; some feminists pushed for individual women's freedom, but the rest pushed for the power of the sisterhood.
    Thanks. I'll definitely read it. :)

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    Angela, women cheat just as often as men. Marriage as an institution is very constraining when it comes to sex. So partners sometimes stray. It is when it veers off into love that it becomes threatening to your partner. Or when she's really great in bed. I have had some very attractive partners that were total cold fish in bed. Some others were dynamite. I wonder what my ex partners would say about me behind my back.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bigsnake49 View Post
    Angela, women cheat just as often as men. Marriage as an institution is very constraining when it comes to sex. So partners sometimes stray. It is when it veers off into love that it becomes threatening to your partner. Or when she's really great in bed. I have had some very attractive partners that were total cold fish in bed. Some others were dynamite. I wonder what my ex partners would say about me behind my back.
    Not in my experience, but maybe it's just the circle of married women with whom I'm friendly. I only know two women who have cheated on their husbands. All the rest are faithful, so far as I know, and women talk. Or maybe it's also partly a generational thing.

    I take that back. One of my college dorm mates cheats on her husband, so that's three, but I don't like her very much, for that and other reasons.

    I'm surprised Greek women would be cold blooded or a lot of them, anyway.

    I can tell you that if a woman doesn't like food she doesn't like sex. Controlling the liking is one thing, not much liking it is another. I think it has to do with the strenth of your desire for sense satisfaction. That's my scientific observation. :)

    If you can laugh at yourself, probably good things. :)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela View Post
    Not in my experience, but maybe it's just the circle of married women with whom I'm friendly. I only know two women who have cheated on their husbands. All the rest are faithful, so far as I know, and women talk. Or maybe it's also partly a generational thing.

    I take that back. One of my college dorm mates cheats on her husband, so that's three, but I don't like her very much, for that and other reasons.

    I'm surprised Greek women would be cold blooded or a lot of them, anyway.

    I can tell you that if a woman doesn't like food she doesn't like sex. Controlling the liking is one thing, not much liking it is another. I think it has to do with the strenth of your desire for sense satisfaction. That's my scientific observation. :)

    If you can laugh at yourself, probably good things. :)
    Oh they are red blooded but only when you're having an argument...well not quite an argument, it is usually one sided, they yell at you and you try to act civilized.

    There was a poll I think some time ago and the percentages of cheating were very close. In the US the cheating percentages drop, but the divorce rates go up.
    Last edited by bigsnake49; 10-04-19 at 03:14.

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    1 out of 1 members found this post helpful.
    Quote Originally Posted by bigsnake49 View Post


    Oh they are hot blooded but only when you're having an argument...well not quite an argument, it is usually one sided, they yell at you and you try to act civilized.

    There was a poll I think some time ago and the percentages of cheating were very close. In the US the cheating percentages drop, but the divorce rates go up.
    Italian men yell back, and it usually ends in a...reconciliation, shall we say. :) My husband admits he used to set me off on purpose. He said he liked to see the "sparks" fly. Then he would laugh, which would just infuriate me more. :)

    Once we had an argument, believe it or not, over the fact that he called my name incessantly when he was home: to get something for him; to see something; to listen to something; to tell him where something was, which he couldn't find, but which was right under his nose. It was endless, like a child calling his mother all day, except that we had no "real" children yet. I couldn't get a damn thing done. It was worse if he tried, for once, to do "manly" jobs around the house. I would have to stand right next to him to be "assistant". I threatened to get in the car and go to my friend's house for the week-end if he didn't leave me alone and give me some peace. The next day he did it even more. At one point late in the afternoon I exploded: I told him I'd stab him to death with my Chef's knife if he didn't leave me alone. (I know: I'm confirming all the stereotypes. Of course I didn't actually mean to do it.) At that point I heard him laughing maniacally upstairs.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela View Post
    Italian men yell back, and it usually ends in a...reconciliation, shall we say. :) My husband admits he used to set me off on purpose. He said he liked to see the "sparks" fly. Then he would laugh, which would just infuriate me more. :)

    Once we had an argument, believe it or not, over the fact that he called my name incessantly when he was home: to get something for him; to see something; to listen to something; to tell him where something was, which he couldn't find, but which was right under his nose. It was endless, like a child calling his mother all day, except that we had no "real" children yet. I couldn't get a damn thing done. It was worse if he tried, for once, to do "manly" jobs around the house. I would have to stand right next to him to be "assistant". I threatened to get in the car and go to my friend's house for the week-end if he didn't leave me alone and give me some peace. The next day he did it even more. At one point late in the afternoon I exploded: I told him I'd stab him to death with my Chef's knife if he didn't leave me alone. (I know: I'm confirming all the stereotypes. Of course I didn't actually mean to do it.) At that point I heard him laughing maniacally upstairs.

    Remind me not to use your name too often Angela.

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    Men can more easily divorce their sexuality from their feelings.
    Goodness knows I'm not excusing it; I just think it's reality.


    I believe this can be 100% true for many of us men until we see the hurt we inflict on our better halves. We're wired differently but probably not a great excuse for our behavior as a whole. On the other hand, promiscuous women seem to make the world go round. :)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela View Post
    Not in my experience, but maybe it's just the circle of married women with whom I'm friendly. I only know two women who have cheated on their husbands. All the rest are faithful, so far as I know, and women talk. Or maybe it's also partly a generational thing.

    I take that back. One of my college dorm mates cheats on her husband, so that's three, but I don't like her very much, for that and other reasons.

    I'm surprised Greek women would be cold blooded or a lot of them, anyway.

    I can tell you that if a woman doesn't like food she doesn't like sex. Controlling the liking is one thing, not much liking it is another. I think it has to do with the strenth of your desire for sense satisfaction. That's my scientific observation. :)

    If you can laugh at yourself, probably good things. :)
    as far as you know, as far as women talk

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    I think cheating depends on the man and the woman themselves instead of numbers. I just feel that most couples in the world are not really meant to be together and they do it at the beginning for convention or solitude/boredom. You dont cheat over true love, love that you worked out a lot to bloom. Even though you would break up at some point because you happened to a crossroad, there still would be love and respect for the other.

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    Quote Originally Posted by matty74 View Post
    Men can more easily divorce their sexuality from their feelings.
    Goodness knows I'm not excusing it; I just think it's reality.


    I believe this can be 100% true for many of us men until we see the hurt we inflict on our better halves. We're wired differently but probably not a great excuse for our behavior as a whole. On the other hand, promiscuous women seem to make the world go round. :)
    Are you as a Man juging yourself and your kind and applausing at Woman who are doing the same? Do you know that women are hating guys like that, a lot?

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    Quote Originally Posted by halfalp View Post
    Are you as a Man juging yourself and your kind and applausing at Woman who are doing the same? Do you know that women are hating guys like that, a lot?
    I'm not following, but the last part was in jest.

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    I don't think men and women think and cheat equally. Women tend more to rather push their men to look better, dress better, and hope to be more successful rather than jumping on the next better one at first sight.

    Men are less patient in that sense and care less. Obviously when women become that pushy it gets irritating even though its for your own good and it's a cry of please do something otherwise adios.

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    How many cheat in America?

    So, my social circle isn't so weird. :) People are more faithful than is assumed, even today.




    The media provides a very distorted view of reality. Most people are not acting like rabbits.


    Promiscuity by religious denomination:

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    'there was a lady in the spa with a bikini' does not list in the top 5 reasons

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    Quote Originally Posted by bicicleur View Post
    'there was a lady in the spa with a bikini' does not list in the top 5 reasons
    You're being too literal, Bicicleur. Look again. Number one reason men gave for cheating: She was so HOT. :)

    I added some other data to that post.

    A lot of men do take form fitting clothes, never mind tiny bikinis, as an invitation, even when it isn't meant that way at all.

    This girl has attitude. :) She knows how to deal with it and call their bluff.



    Now imagine if she had a better figure and was wearing fitted, really feminine clothes.

    That's how men are...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela View Post
    You're being too literal, Bicicleur. Look again. Number one reason men gave for cheating: She was so HOT. :)
    I added some other data to that post.
    A lot of men do take form fitting clothes, never mind tiny bikinis, as an invitation, even when it isn't meant that way at all.
    This girl has attitude. :) She knows how to deal with it and call their bluff.

    Now imagine if she had a better figure and was wearing fitted, really feminine clothes.
    That's how men are...
    well, it's obvious, these men are all losers, having nothing else to do than hanging around in the street
    and they all had some comments, but none of them didn't get any further than a few words
    other men won't waist ther time, because they know they don't stand a chance (not because they don't want)

    the top 5 isn't realy a top 5
    it are 5 excuses the people in the survey were allowed to choose from to justify their cheating behaviour

    for adultery, unless if it is forced rape, it takes 2 people to consent
    just the other one being hot is not enough

    also the percentage cheating is not the same as the percentage that admits cheating

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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela View Post

    What interests me about the above is that women are evidently selecting men for greater amorousness. "My partner stopped paying attention to me" has many likely reasons, but "his sex drive is high" will not be among them.

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